Have you ever been around someone who is bitter? If so, you know they are not pleasant to be around. A bitter person brings negativity everywhere they go. Bitterness not only impacts those around us. It also impacts the person who is bitter. You have seen this to be true when you have harbored bitterness. Bitterness leads us to focus only on the people who have hurt us or the disappointments we have faced. While bitterness feels good in the moment, it does not serve us well. This is why Scripture calls us to let go of bitterness and to seek peace instead.
What causes people to hold on to bitterness?
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1. Read Matthew 5:9. What does it look like to work for peace in our world today?
Matthew 5:9
God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.
2. Read Ephesians 4:31-32. How does holding on to the negative attributes in verse 31 impact us?
Ephesians 4:31-32
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. 32Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
3. How would following the command in verse 32 help us to let go of bitterness?
4. How have you been impacted by Christ’s forgiveness, and how does His forgiveness motivate you to seek peace?
1. What has caused you to hold on to bitterness in the past?
2. What has held you back from letting go of bitterness and seeking peace?
3. How can you let go of bitterness and be a peacemaker this week?
Look back at Ephesians 4:31-32. Name one negative attribute from this passage of Scripture that you need to get rid of, along with one positive attribute that you need to take on. Share that with your group, and commit to getting rid of the negative attribute and putting on the positive attribute this week.
We know that bitterness does not serve us well. We know that we must put aside bitterness if we want to grow and thrive. The question is, how do we do this? Today, we are going to turn to Scripture to look at three characteristics that keep bitterness at bay: Forgiveness, humility, and gratitude.
Instead of bitterness, Scripture calls us to forgiveness. Indeed, forgiveness leads to peace and restoration while bitterness leads to chaos. While bitterness may be tempting, forgiveness brings joy, hope, and lightness that bitterness does not.
1. Read Colossians 3:13.
Colossians 3:13
Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
2. Who does this passage of Scripture call us to forgive?
3. How does forgiveness help us let go of bitterness?
4. Without naming names, who do you need to forgive whom you have been harboring bitterness against?
Instead of bitterness, we would be better served to have a spirit of humility. You see, we all mess up at times. We have all needed God’s forgiveness and grace. When we remember this truth, it is much easier to let go of bitterness and seek restoration in our relationships, even when we have been hurt by others.
1. Read Romans 5:6-8. What was our situation before Christ, according to this passage of Scripture?
Romans 5:6-8
When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. 7Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. 8But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.
2. What was our situation before Christ, according to this passage of Scripture?
3. How does humbly remembering our helplessness and need for forgiveness motivate us to seek peace over bitterness when others have hurt us?
4. What does it look like in our world today to practice humility and remember our helplessness before God without Christ?
If we want to get rid of bitterness, we simply need to choose gratitude. After all, it is impossible to be bitter when we are holding on to gratitude. Gratitude reminds us of all the gifts God has given us in our lives and encourages us to focus on our gifts rather than on the people and situations that tempt us to be bitter.
1. Read 1st Thessalonians 5:16-18.
1st Thessalonians 5:16-18
Always be joyful. 17Never stop praying. 18Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.
2. What stands out to you in this passage of Scripture about how followers of Christ are called to live?
3. How does gratitude drown out bitterness?
4. Name three things you are grateful for right now.
Pick one characteristic that you want to focus on over the next week: Forgiveness, humility, or gratitude. Share what you chose to focus on with your group, along with one step you will take to focus on that characteristic. End your time together in prayer, asking God to help each of you as you seek to let go of bitterness and choose forgiveness, humility, and gratitude instead.
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