Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Ephesians 6:4a
Each child whom God has placed in our lives is a precious gift from God. Yes, children test our boundaries and our patience, but they are one of the greatest gifts we have been given from Him. We have the responsibility to treat the children He has placed in our lives with love, grace, and compassion instead of anger and frustration that leads them to be angry and frustrated.
The apostle Paul instructs fathers to treat their children in a way that does not lead their children to be easily angered in Ephesians 6. In this passage of Scripture, He writes, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them” (verse 4). This command is specifically issued to fathers, but it is good instruction for all of us with children in our lives to follow. The command is straightforward. We are not to treat the kids in our lives in such a way that will lead to them becoming angry. When we provoke the children in our lives so that they become angry, we lose our influence, and the children in our lives are more likely to turn away from the advice we give them.
We would all agree that obeying the command in Ephesians 6:4 and not behaving in such a way that we provoke our children to anger will lead to good consequences. The question is, how do we live this way? James, the author of the book of James, tells us how to behave so that we do not provoke others to anger in James 1. In this chapter of James, he writes, “You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (verse 19). In a world where most people are slow to listen, quick to speak, and quick to get angry, Christ-followers are called to live differently. When we are slow to listen, we can better understand others, respond more thoughtfully, and be slow to get angry with others. This is particularly true when it comes to how we respond to the children in our lives. When we listen well, speak more slowly, and become slow to respond in anger, we can lead the children in our lives more effectively.
It is easy to talk about listening quickly, speaking slowly, and being slow to get angry, but it is more challenging to live this way. Living this way, especially when raising the children in our lives, takes practice and discipline. Yes, it takes discipline to be the kind of people James describes in James 1:19, but when we take steps to live this way, we will have healthier, stronger relationships with the children in our lives, and we will be able to lead them better and point them to Christ.
Choose today to commit to being slow to anger when it comes to raising the children in your life. In your journal or a notebook, write down the phrase from James 1:19: quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Commit to obeying the words you wrote down from James 1:19. Ask God to help you as you seek to be “slow to get angry,” especially when it comes to raising your children.
James 1:19-27
19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. 20 Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires. 21 So get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, and humbly accept the word God has planted in your hearts, for it has the power to save your souls.
22 But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves. 23 For if you listen to the word and don’t obey, it is like glancing at your face in a mirror. 24 You see yourself, walk away, and forget what you look like. 25 But if you look carefully into the perfect law that sets you free, and if you do what it says and don’t forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it.
26 If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless. 27 Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.
©2024 Sagebrush Church
